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this is my very first time writing a sim story.
Brutal constructive criticism is highly accepted! So please, do let me know.
i tried to cut down on little events & detail to keep the storyline going, let me know how i did!
Brutal constructive criticism is highly accepted! So please, do let me know.
i tried to cut down on little events & detail to keep the storyline going, let me know how i did! In this simple house, it is easy and clear to see how trouble-free and straight forward the life of the people living there could be. You can walk by any house and sort of guess what type of person lives there. For instance, when you see a beach house made from glass, you would imagine there being a rich snob sunbathing in the backyard, and when you see a small trashy one room house, you imagine a slum licking off the mustard from the hair on his chest. It’s just the way things sketch in our general minds. This doesn’t occur in all our minds, of course. In this particular house, lived two beautiful women, fresh out of college. Lydia had luscious orange hair and a sharp attitude to match her sharp collar bones. She had a degree in philosophy and a mind that was so twisted you could make a knot. Her best friend and roommate, Nellie, had natural blond hair and a heart triple the size of Albert Einstein’s mind. Her beauty shined through the glow of her fair skin. She was a teacher, which was the only way they paid the rent, for Lydia was unemployed. “C’mon Lydia, the taxi will be here in five minutes” Nellie called to Lydia from downstairs. Lydia brushed on that last swift of blush on her cheeks before stepping down the stairs. “Well, well, Lydia. Don’t you just look beautiful”
“Yes, I do” Lydia smiled, taking her steps towards Nellie, and then femininely punching her in the gut. “Let’s wait outside” After the noisy taxi ride, Lydia was disappointed at where they ended up.
“Nellie, I thought we were going to a club? What’s up with the classiness?” Lydia said, surprised and dissatisfied.
“Oh darling no, tonight we are going to be ladies” This disgusted Lydia. She felt like getting drunk at a club with dancing and men, not a elegant evening at what seemed to be a play.
“It’s your favourite, Sweeney Todd” Nellie smiled, she was so sly.
“Really? In that case, in, in, in!!” Lydia hurried inside. They sat down in their allocated seats, it wasn’t completely packed, but that would make the night all the more brilliant. The lights dimmed.
“I’m so excited” Nellie whispered, leaning closer to Lydia’s side, pulling the anxiousness away from her.
“Me too” Lydia mouthed.
The play had begun, and the actors were amazing. All in the audience were trapped in their voices. Or so it seemed. All of a sudden, the main actor stopped, he just stopped. But not only that, he was staring at Lydia. It was honestly the most awkward thing ever experienced by her, to have a strange, but handsome man just staring. There must have been something wrong with her face, why else would he be staring? She did not know what else to do besides smile stupidly, so, so stupidly. Everyone on stage froze, trying to understand what had happened, but no one could know what was going on in this man’s head. The lady seemed irritated that she had to stop singing; she was also staring at her. Great! The beautiful gentleman shook away the tight gaze, and began singing again, from the exact note he stopped on when ‘the event’ happened. Lydia noticed people still trying to distinguish what, or who, engaged the actors attention. It was supposed to be the other way round, it wasn’t right. Lydia hated Nellie for this. If she was at a club she could get drunk and not remember a thing when she woke up next. But now, this would be fixed in her mind and stamped on everything she touches, until the next thing happened, which wasn’t likely to transpire anytime soon. After the performance, Lydia could not wait to just leave. Nellie was trailing behind her, following the path of Lydia’s nerves. But that path was broken by one mysterious, creepy man.
“Excuse me, miss” He said, impatiently, as though worried she would escape his wrath. She turned around to face him, and smiled. She didn’t want to but it was so hard not to. He really was so freaking glimmeringly handsome. “I wanted to apologise, I’m guessing that was quite humiliating for you, I couldn’t help myself. You just, are so beautiful” He blushed adorably. She held her arm inwards with the other, also blushing. Her nerves flowing rapidly through her veins.
“Thank you, I uh..”
“George! C’mon lets go” A blonde beauty said, grabbing ‘George’s’ arm.
“I, uh, I’m sorry again!” He said as she pulled him, and his hopes away from Lydia. She watched George leave until Nellie came up to her,
“Forget about it, love, after all, it’s just a play, right?” She smiled, already knowing that what she said did not even mean anything. Lydia nodded and followed Nellie out to the taxi area, where she prayed that tomorrow would really be a new day. The morning following that dreadful evening, Lydia woke up to find breakfast prepared on the edge of her bed. She smiled and thanked the morning for shining its sun onto her. Then she remembered what happened last night, and appreciated the light all the more. It wouldn’t do what the night did. Never. Lydia walked down the stairs to see Nellie already dressed, making breakfast.
“Morning! Did you eat?” Nellie said, she seemed so excited today, it was unusual.
“Yeah, thanks!” Lydia lied; she didn’t want to seem ungrateful. Nellie started humming as she ate her food. “What’s gotten you so happy?” Lydia questioned, sitting in front of her.
“I have a date tonight!” Nellie smiled, her eyes glistening brightly, like nice cool water reflected the suns rays. Lydia squealed,
“With who!?”
“Mr. Bower, a physics and chemistry teacher from school, I’ve been out with him a few times, for lunch and stuff, but never a full, proper date!”
“Aha! Lucky you!” Lydia said, recollecting the memories of her past dates. Nellie went off to work, leaving Lydia all alone, which was usual, but never this effective. Lydia always found a way to disguise the loneliness. But not this time, after finally being in the presence of a proper male, it was just different. She missed college life, people everywhere you go. But then again, look where that got her. Since boredom was pouring out of her brains like water overflowing from an already filled cup, she needed a walk. She walked all the way into town, attempting to leave her mind empty of thoughts, and instead images of wondrous natural scenery. Rather, she saw him, in her mind, and then, in real life. Her legs had led her to the grocer, where she went inside to purchase a few things, for the sake of eating. While she compared the many different prices and brands of toast, she noticed him. George was there. Already! It hadn’t even been a day yet, but there he was, looking at some canned foods. Then abruptly, she saw him running to her slowly, and then swinging her into a romantic embrace. But then she noticed that it wasn’t real. But he was there, staring at her, as if to make sure she was still alive. “It’s you,” He blushed and shied a little. Lydia smiled, “I’m Danny” He said, swinging his arm out for a shake.
“I’m Lydia” She whispered, it was all that would come out of her mouth. She shook his hand softly.
“I still need to apologise, I was thinking about it all night, I feel so bad, you know, I didn’t ruin your evening did I?”
“Of course not, I’m fine, you’re fine, we’re all good!” She giggled uncontrollably, and she didn’t know why. It seemed that she hadn’t been this entwined into a human conversation with a male in a while. It was horrible. “Here, how about we go ahead and pay for these, then I’ll take you out for lunch?” He smiled at her, causing the beginning of her meltdown.
“Free food, ofcourse” He laughed a little, she liked it a lot. They bought their groceries and walked off together, they looked entirely beautiful as one, and they both knew that. He took her to a cute little restaurant, Ambrosial Ambiance. The vibe is so good; you would want to eat it! They acquired seating outdoors, where it truly was striking. However that did not fix the awkward plight they had situated themselves in. They swallowed their anticipation and values with whatever the hell was in their cup.
“You know, I don’t really go out with many women”
“Oh, neither do I” He looked at her questioningly, and then laughed.
“Did you like the play? I never asked”
“Yes, yes, I loved it! Besides the whole staring thing, you were so good”
They kept talking, about Sweeney Todd, favourite foods, and the melancholy events of the world. “So, when will I be taking you out again?” He asked as he walked her to her vehicle as she got out her smokes.
“Oh, you want more?” She flirted, Lydia could not help herself. It has been a while nevertheless, so it was okay, right?
“Let’s go for a picnic tomorrow, at the park ‘round the corner of the theatre”
“Are you kidding me?” She raised an eyebrow.
“I am not, it’ll be fun. Meet me there say, twelve-thirty, get it?”
“Got it”
“Good” and with that, he walked away, leaving Nellie with a smile bigger than her face could manage to fit. When Nellie officially came home, looking very spiffy in her black silk dress, Lydia was deep into a movie. With tissues to absorb her tears, and alcohol to absorb her emotions.
“Don’t tell me you’ve been drinking” Nellie’s humble voice said.
“Nellie! How was it?” She said, shaking off whatever was left of her feelings.
“Pretty good, pretty good, his quite the man’, what movie were you watching?”
“Some old crap on tv” Lydia said as she gestured Nellie to join her. Instead Nellie proclaimed that she was going to bed. Lydia thought highly of this idea. Until she realised the bottle was not empty. At the break of dawn, the two girls headed straight for the gym. Lydia still recovering from a seriously late night.
“You should have stayed sleeping” Nellie was concerned, as usual.
“I remember the day I stopped listening to teachers” Lydia teased. Nellie could not help but laugh. She was right after all, she couldn’t tell Lydia what to do. But in this case, it still seemed reasonable.
“So, when do I get to meet lover boy!?” Lydia asked Nellie after a relaxing shower at home following the gym.
“His name is Bruce, and whenever you want really, don’t forget I like one teaspoon of sugar with my coffee”
“Sure thing, I just want to make sure his good enough for you” Lydia said, handing Nellie her coffee.
“Lydia, you still seemed worried. Is the Sweeney man still on your mind?”
“Nah, the past is the past, it’s not like I’ll be seeing him again, right?” She smiled. Lydia did not want to tell Nellie, she needed time for maybe this didn’t last. There he was, wearing the same hat as he was yesterday. His expression went from gloom and doom, to something so profound and happy.
“Lydia, my friend! How are you?” He rejoiced. He really planned a picnic. He wasn’t lying.
“I’m great thanks, yourself?” Lydia said, still taking it all in.
“I’m fine, however, unlike you. You look like you’ve seen a ghost”
“That would be a nice change actually” Lydia said as she sat crossed legged beside him.
“Well, since I am no ghost and clearly good looking enough that you are actually here, let’s eat!” Danny said, still confused by what she meant. He wanted to understand her, he really did. After eating, they sat there silently whispering to each other, taking small sips of their peppermint tea.
“Wasn’t this nice?” He whispered, his voice blinding her heart.
“Yes, it was” Clear words did not come out, she didn’t want them too. She’d rather sit here staring at the clouds, although the back on back thing didn’t work for her. She wanted to face him, to stare at his gleaming eyes, but of course, so did he. But he couldn’t let her know that, he didn’t want her to think that’s all he wanted. So for now, they played it easy. Until he couldn’t take it. He jumped on her and she stared at him, a bit worried.
“I’m sorry, but I cannot take it” He said desperately. But somehow, she was flattered.
“Danny, this isn’t real, I don’t know you and you don’t know me”
“My name is Danny De Silva, I’m a cop and I’m 25 years old. I enjoy boats and horror movies. Acting is my second passion, other than you at the moment” He said so fast she had to think a while in order to attempt to put his words together.
“I’m Lydia Nicholson, I’m 24 and I live with my best friend in a rented cozy house, I enjoy walking and designing. I love reading and I’m unemployed”
“Perfect” He smiled, coming in closer. Lydia’s nervous system must have been fully nervous, for she immediately shoved him off. Her heart right then swelled in pains of regret. His face was soft and sad, but she was not ready, just not ready.
“Maybe next time” She winked, as she picked up her purse, dropping a little letter with her number into his empty teacup. She walked home, proud. As soon as little miss attractive got home, a wave of realisation hit her, almost throwing her into the ground. He wants me, she thought, and of course she was right. After all, a girl like her usually had lots of men ready to paint her with kisses of trash. Her low self esteem led to low self respect. A quality highly accepted among the male society. Yet, she saw his willing to wait, to wait for her to now realise her feelings for him. Because he knew they were there. So what was the point of waiting? It's not like he waited last time. She looked at the time, 3:40, the clock read. It meant that Nellie would be home soon, unless she was meeting him...again. But why not? She deserved a bit of fun out. Getting extremely fed up with the patientness of the clock, Lydia bolted from her bed down to the pub. She needed a drink. Oh, how badly she needed a drink.
"Lydia, is that you Lydia?" The fancied up business man type said inquisitively.
"No, I'm an alien robot from outer space, I've come to open up your body and steal your reproductive organs" She said bluntly, signaling the bartender to her tab. The man stared at her, regret and pity pulled at her muscles. "Yes, yes, I'm Lydia" She rolled her eyes.
"It's Matthew. Remember? From..." "From my sophomore years, how did I forget?" Lydia continued for him. This was surely a man she could not have forgotten, a professor, a gorgeous one at that, who marked more than her grades.
He looked her up and down,
"You've grown up in such a short amount of time"
"Yes, my alien body does not like to stay young… and foolish" She joked dryly. He gave her a disingenuous smile which no matter how many times after class she saw it, still made her quiver.
"Since you’re out of college and all, how about you let me take care of all your tabs?" He winked, sliding his mischievous hand towards her. Lydia's face splashed itself pale, her eyes widened and her body ached. This man had hurt her enough.
"I don't think so, Mattie" She said, aggressively shoving his hand away, before it came any closer.
"You can't still be upset. I didn't ask for you to get caught with me! If anything that was my worst fear" He sounded like a baby, sooking to his mother that it wasn't his fault the vase fell.
"Just please, go back to teaching and leave me alone" Considering her luck, he didn't leave. Rather, he stood up, motioning for her to follow. Her thoughts of distress pushed her towards him. She knew this would kill her, she knew. Nellie came home unlike most days. For today, she came home with a friend ... or what not.
"Lydia darling, where are you?" She almost sang. "Guess she isn't home, strangely" Nellie grimaced. She had been so excited to show Lydia her teaching buddy, whom she fell so madly in love with.
"How about we have some tea outside, until she comes back. It's so beautiful out there" He was very comforting, his voice was like a miraculous god, crooning his newborn to sleep. Bruce was very understanding, intelligent and psychologically romantic. Nellie was attracted to all those qualities at first sense of them. Lydia staggered though the front door, laughing, but crying. It was abstruse how she did not fall on her weak, slim feet until she collided into stairs, a key to let Nellie and Bruce know that the drunken princess' chariot had arrived. "Oh, goodness, are you okay?" Nellie said, helping Lydia up near the couch, accompanied by Bruce. Lydia's face changed, she was now revolted.
“Ugh, I am so sick of teachers! Get away from me!” She said, kicking poor Bruce away. Nellie’s anger had triggered. Why had Lydia allowed this to happen to herself? What on Earth did she even do?
“You need rest” Nellie insisted, Lydia’s face turned from a look of disgust, to one symbolising a puppy, a sad, sad puppy. But still, she listened to her owner and napped. It was easy, the alcoholic fumes drained out all her energy.
“I’m so sorry, something must have happened, she doesn’t usually drink like this, only when..”
“Don’t worry about it, I understand completely. My brother has a roommate as well” He smiled with empathy. “It’s getting late, I’m behind on preparation for classes” “Um, would you please let them know that I won’t make it, but don’t tell them why” Nellie requested of him.
“Sure thing, beautiful” he said, giving her the first kiss they had shared. Her hopes were low; she didn’t expect him to do anything at all. But he did, and she almost got carried away, her hand exploring the newly discovered land. Man. He stopped her with a demonic smile,
“Not so fast, my love” and with that, he departed, the decrementing sounds of his footsteps brightening her emotions of desire and degradation. Morning had well past, it was almost two and Lydia hadn’t been able to move herself, physically and mentally. Nellie sat beside her, attempting to interpret what was wrong with Lydia. But ofcourse she couldn’t have known, for Lydia had not told her a thing. She had locked her past experiences in a jar, sealed the lid and thrown it into the atmosphere.
“Lydia, can you feel it when I tickle you?” Nellie asked, scratching her friend’s fragile skin playfully. Lydia laughed.
“Yes, yes, I’m fine. You had not needed to stay”
“I needed reassurance that you’re fine”
“Why? What did I do last night?” Lydia raised an eyebrow.
“Oh, I don’t know, why don’t you tell me?” Lydia knew this was coming. She thought she could ditch the idea for longer, but she caved. “Nel, I’m so sorry, I made a fool of you and myself and…”
“I’m not talking about…”
“Neither am i. Nel, he was there, and he bought me drinks, my favourite kind. We did it, like the old days, we did it” She trembled, her eyes on the brink of shedding some tears.
“That son of a gun! Lydia, oh darling Lydia” Nellie knew what she was talking about, this had left Lydia insecure for a few years now. But for it to happen again was different. It was worse.“How did you fall for him?”
“He paid my tab?” They both laughed. But it was interrupted by a sudden vibration. Both expected it to be for Nellie, although this time it wasn’t. “Hello?” Lydia answered her phone.
“Lydia! Hi, it’s Danny” She felt his nervousness trickle her ear so warmly.
“Yes, hi Danny” Lydia controlled the pleasure that ran through her like a dying flower absorbing the fresh rain.
“I was wondering, if you wanted to come to my place, for some dinner?” This made Lydia shoot out of her bed like a cannon from a cannon ball.
“Listen Danny, that’s too hasty, don’t you think?” Nellie now glared at her.
“Yes, I do, but I’d rather take my chances” “Alright, text me your address, I’ll be there tomorrow, around seven?”
“Actually, I was hoping tonight?”
“Tonight! Ah, well, okay!” Lydia had gone to the moon and back. It was so speedy but, so magical.
They said their farewells right after, because it was apparent that Lydia had some proper talking to do, and now, for the clock was ticking untill it all uncovered.
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14 Comment(s) posted so far
On Dec 15, 2009 nomienu wrote:
i'm confused...wat happen to George and whos danny...it was great up until picture 19, after that it was a bit confusing...but great start...i wonder what happens next
On Dec 15, 2009 Golden97 wrote:
Great Chapter
Really good for a first story 
Cant wait for chapter two 
On Dec 15, 2009 xxheartlessxx12 wrote:
As a fellow Sim Story writer, I wanted to share some advice, I hope you don't mind. It was a bit confusing...try to make it clear to the readers who the characters are and how they play a role; like how they fit into the story. Other than that, it was good.
On Dec 15, 2009 martoele wrote:
Good for a first story... Let's see what happens.... Merry Christmas - Margo.
On Dec 15, 2009 Parisleaf wrote:
Great Part
Keep writing! Can't wait until part 2 is out! 
On Dec 16, 2009 mnlynn wrote:
Great story...looking forward to more. Love the hair on Lydia and Nellie.
On Dec 17, 2009 Illandrya wrote:
Congratulations on taking the plunge in submitting that first story. It can be a scary step! Your writing style is good, but I agree with some of the other readers that at times it is a little confusing who the characters are and their relationships to each other and the story. I look forward to reading more of your work.
On Dec 18, 2009 Mangio wrote:
interesting
cant wait to read more...
On Dec 19, 2009 drewsoltesz wrote:
Nice shots, keep going, a wee bit confusing, but a good first effort!
On Jan 7, 2010 charray wrote:
Very good story
On Jan 16, 2010 candy820 wrote:
Good start.
off to read the other parts.
On Jan 20, 2010 willsmom2005 wrote:
Nice... Going to read the next two parts now.
On Feb 22, 2010 sims1latina88 wrote:
nice cover story shot!
On Feb 27, 2010 joxanth wrote:
Nice job
Thanks for sharing!