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The Berkeley Diaries
Published Jul 13, 2009

Written By



Page 1 / 64

Olivia Berkeley, daughter of the acclaimed Sir Remington Berkeley, has just been told that her life is about to change. The youngest son of the Landgraab dynasty, William, has just asked for her hand in marriage. Tying the two wealthiest families together would be a dream come true for Olivia's family, but will marrying the man she doesn't love cause her to lose herself in the process? Is this once in a lifetime opportunity all it's cracked up to be?

Olivia Berkeley, daughter of the acclaimed Sir Remington Berkeley, has just been told that her life is about to change. The youngest son of the Landgraab dynasty, William, has just asked for her hand in marriage. Tying the two wealthiest families together would be a dream come true for Olivia's family, but will marrying the man she doesn't love cause her to lose herself in the process? Is this once in a lifetime opportunity all it's cracked up to be? "Darling, can you imagine what it would do for our family name? Being related to the Landgraabs is like being next in line for the throne. Can't you see that it's the best thing for Olivia," continued Lady Patricia Berkeley, who had been ecstatic since the news of William Landgraab's proposal.

"I find that this is the best opportunity for Olivia, you're right. But it's not going to be easy for her, Patricia. This is like a business arrangement between our families, a mere way of combining the bloodlines," mused Sir Remington.

Patricia took her husband's words in with little emotion or thought. "She's too young to know what's best for her future. I know what is best for her. I am her mother," Patricia stated cooly before turning to leave the room.
The cool breeze following the descent of the sun was a relief to my skin. I looked at my watch and noted the time. I still had a few minutes before Mariah would be here to meet me, leaving me with a few minutes to think about the day's events. I could remember Matt's hands holding my own while I rested my head on his shoulders. I could remember the smell of the ocean we talked about old memories. I could remember the smile that crossed my face as he handed me the small box that held the most precious pair of pearls earrings I'd ever seen... "Olivia!" yelled Mariah, interrupting my thoughts.

"Oh, hey!" I replied, snapping back to reality. "Did you get everything you needed from the bookstore?" I asked.

"Yep, I've got all the recipes I need," she replied. "So how was your date with Matt?" she asked in a low, mocking tone.

"It was a lot of fun. Oh! He gave me these," I said, pointing to the pearls in my ears.

"Aw, those are beautiful," she enthused, leaning close to observe them.

"Come on, let's get home before it gets dark," I instructed.
"Darling! There you are. I was just about to send someone to look for you. Your father and I have some wonderful news," began Patricia.

Feeling a rush of anxiety assault my body, I stared at both of my parents, watching my father most intently and noticing that he did not once look me in the eyes. "What is it?" I asked nervously.
"Oh sweetie, William Landgraab has asked for permission to marry you. Isn't that wonderful?"

My heart felt like it had dropped into my stomach from such heavy disappointment. Wanting to panic and throw a fit, I was struggling to control my rage. I took a pitiful glance at my father, then back to my mother, whose face was lit with excitement. My emotions began to boil over.

"I cannot accept this request," I said cooly before turning to practically run out of the room.
I felt my heart wrench as soon as Matt entered my mind. His smile, his laugh, his silly jokes. "I really do love him," I thought to myself as I went over the bridge at Pattie's Cross near the east end of our property.

I thought back to when Matt and I had met. We were 12 at the time and I remember I had fallen off of this very bridge while sitting on the railing. I remembered Matt's arms wrapping around me as I struggled to fight the current of the river. His embrace was a comfort even then. We'd known each other all of this time and I don't even know if he feels the same way about me as I do him...

The thought made me quicken my pace and soon I was on the way to my sister's house...
"Hey sweetie!" greeted Denise, wrapping her arms around me.

At this point, my eyes were filled with tears of despair. I filled my sister in on all that had happened throughout the day and her sentiments didn't help me feel much better.

"Try to understand that William Landgraab is a match made in heaven. He's rich, has the reputation of a god, and is undeniably good looking," she said matter-of-factly. "As for Matt, he can't offer you any security. And up until today, neither of you revealed your feelings to each other. It's too late for that now. This is the opportunity that you need to take before it slips through your fingers."

I gave her words a lot of consideration. I never told Matt how I felt about him, how did I even know he felt the same way? Marrying William would be the best thing for my future and for my family. I let out a sigh, feeling my heart rip at the seams with sorrow...
"Mariah, where is your sister?" demanded Patricia over dinner.

"I don't know. I just saw her run through the back door of the kitchen while I was cooking dinner," replied Mariah. "What did you say to her, mother?"

"William Landgraab has asked for your sister's hand in marriage, and I accepted the request for her. It's a perfect match and it secures Olivia's future and the future of our family reputation," Lady Patricia replied sourly.

"You did what?!" Mariah exclaimed, immediately getting up from the table. "How could you?"
Lady Patricia gave Mariah a disgusted, insulted look before excusing herself from the table. Sir Remington was left to eat alone.

Feeling sorry for her father, Mariah went back to the dining hall to keep him company. She opened up her cook book to begin planning meals for the next week. Her father soon finished eating and went to the kitchen. He returned to sit at the table across from Mariah.

"You know that your mother is right about one thing, this opportunity is in your sister's best interest. I know that her heart belongs to that Fulton boy, but that is not true love," Sir Remington began.

Listening to my father's words, I cringed at how much they stung me. Even he knew how I felt. Why am I such a coward? I held in my emotions and let out a sigh. I continued to listen to Mariah defend me until I couldn't take the pain anymore and sleep sounded like a much better use of energy.
"Mother, I have made my decision," I let out, hanging my head to hide my true feelings. I knew I really never had a choice in the matter.

"Aw, darling, I knew you would come around," my mother replied with an evil smirk. I resented my mother for her insensitivity. I wanted to scream at her, but instead, I turned on my heels and headed toward the living area.
Seeking refuge, I ran into my father's arms. He smelled of his favorite cologne, a familiar fragrance that reminded me of my childhood. I felt a lump come to my throat. It hit me that I would be saying goodbye to him and Mariah far sooner than I wanted to... "Come, sweetheart, sit with me," insisted my father as he took a seat. "I have something to tell you," he began as I took a seat next to him.

"You are such a beautiful young lady, Olivia. You have so much dignity and potential. I know that this will not be easy for you, but you will do well, this I know," he said with a smile. "I know that you are in love with Matt Fulton. I've known for a long time now. He will always hold a place in your heart. But he cannot offer you a future, Olivia. It's a love that is true, no doubt, but it's not one that is practical, my love."

His face was sincere enough, but I couldn't help but think 'when is love ever practical?'...
I decided to take a walk and deliver a letter to Matt explaining everything. I was too big a coward to tell him in person, although I probably owed him that much.

The smell of the salty ocean waters burned my nose as I stopped to admire the lighthouse. Tears streamed down my cheeks as my heart began to split in two. Why had I never told him I loved him? Now he would never know...
The next morning, I awoke before the sun rose. I got dressed and layed on my couch to try to get more sleep. I was stuck between a deep sleep and a doze, when I decided that I was too nervous to sleep comfortably, for I would be meeting with William Landgraab with the next couple of hours. My heart skipped a beat... With the time winding down until William came over, I went out onto the porch to gather myself and my emotions. I looked out over the horizon, admiring all of Sunset Valley. I took in a deep breath. I need to be strong. I can do this. I can do it for my future, for my family, for honor. "Lady Patricia, it's a pleasure," began William. "Likewise," she replied, shaking his hand.

Anxiety overwhelming me, I greeted William politely with a kiss on the cheek. "You look lovely," he said matter-of-factly, almost routinely, sending a chill down my spine.
"Darling, could you give us a minute?" Mother asked. Of course I couldn't refuse, so I left the room, feeling some relief.

"Mr. Landgraab, I hope you will have patience with my daughter, she's a little stubborn. She doesn't quite see this as the opportunity that she should," Patricia said politely.

"Lady Patricia, this is a business arrangement between our families. A simple knot in the family ties. I don't expect to need much patience with your daughter since I have no desire to be near her except when necessary," William returned solemnly.
The following evening, William and I went on an official date. It was very romantic, a small late-night picnik on the beach. Afterward, we went for a walk along the shoreline; one might agree that it was quite picturesque.

"I suppose I should do this the proper way," William began.

"What are you talking about?" I asked. I knew immediately what he meant when he sank to one knee and looked up at me. Despite the false feelings pulsating through my body, I couldn't help but feel this was real.
When he pulled out the ring, I covered my mouth to hold in a scream. The diamond was huge! I held my breath as he took it out of the box, took my hand ever so gently, and slid the ring on my finger. I just stared at it, dumbfounded. "So you like it?" asked William.

It took me a second to answer, for I had to practically tear my eyes off of the diamond. "Oh yes! It's beautiful," I let out.

"Good, so we are official now. Since we will be residing in the same estate, it's only respectable that we are committed," insisted William before directing me back toward the limo.
After returning to the estate, William invited me to join him in the living area. "I thought you had better know that the wedding has been arranged for tomorrow. I know it's short notice, but your mother has called and insisted that we marry right away, a rather private event."

"Oh, wow. That's really soon," I said, feeling my heart sink. I couldn't help but picture Matt's face in my mind. I hadn't heard from him since I had left him the letter. I tried to conceal my feelings so that William wouldn't notice my sorrow.

"You should get to bed. We have a long day tomorrow," William said while getting up to leave the room.
Listening to the sound of the incoming waves, trying to clear my mind, I looked out over the ocean and attempted to escape from everything that was about to happen. I felt beautiful on the outside in my expensive gown, but I felt broken on the inside with a heart that had been torn... As soon as I entered the room, my mother fished me out of the small crowd of family members and a few friends.

I hated how she acted as if this was my dream come true and not hers. "Olivia! Isn't this just wonderful?" she asked in an excited voice.

I threw up my arms in agitation, "Mother! Stop acting like this is the best thing in the world. I'm doing this for my family, but in case you didn't know, my heart is breaking in the process." I whispered firmly, trying not to cause a scene.

"Oh darling, don't be so dramatic!" she said with a snobbish tone. Before I could reply, my eyes had drifted to a familiar face that had my heart racing at the sight.
"Excuse me mother." I said half-heartedly, turning to walk over to the owner of that handsome face.

"Oh Matt," I let out, wanting to cry.

"Hey. Wow, you look beautiful," he began, that smile I love so much shining brightly on his face.

I was speechless. I didn't know what to say. All that wanted to come out was sobs and tears. "M..Ma..Matt, how did you know when I was getting...married?"

"Denise," he replied, taking in a deep breath. "I feel like this changes everything," he let out, his agony evident in his voice.

"Oh Matt, I'm sorry. I am so sorry. I don't want this. I am so sorry if I hurt you. I'm doing this for my family," I rambled on, quickly losing control of my emotions.
"For your family?" He inquired sarcastically. "For your family?!" he began to raise his voice. I couldn't do anything but stare at him pitifully. "Olivia, I'm sorry, but what about how you feel? Why are you sacrificing your heart for the sake of honor?"

I took in a deep breath before answering, "Matt, it's just something that I feel obligated to do."
I felt faint from all the emotional exhaustion that I lost my balance and nearly fell right in front of Matt. Luckily he caught my hand to steady me. I looked up at him, my eyes glazed over with salty tears. I saw his facial expression loosen at the sight of me. "Olivia, I believe this is my fault. If only I had told you years ago how I feel about you, how much you mean to me. I love you Olivia. I love every bit of you. I always have, from the moment I saved you from drowning at Pattie's Cross when we were just kids..." Matt leaned down to kiss me on the cheek. I could see the tears in his eyes as he turned to leave me speechless. I felt the ache of my broken heart take hold of me completely. What have I done? On the way to find Matt, I ran into Denise. My blood boiled at the idea that Matt being here to witness my heartbreak was her doing. "How could you invite Matt?!" I exclaimed in a whisper.

"It was the least I could do. He had to know, and I know you've been dying to see him. This may as well be your only chance to do so," she replied.

She was right. This would probably be my last time to see Matt. Having him around too often would look suspicious, especially now that he has confessed his love for me. "He told me he loved me," I proclaimed, wanting to let out the sobs that fought to escape me.

"Well of course he did. Bad timing though..." she said sympathetically. "I'm so sorry Olivia, but everything happens for a reason, that's my philosophy."

Before I could attempt to reason why that wasn't a good theory, William came over and touched my arm, "It's time," he said.
My heart was racing faster than time itself as I took William's hand to apply the wedding band. I looked up at him nervously after I'd slipped it on his finger, but he didn't even meet my gaze. After we exchanged rings, he placed his hands around my shoulders to plant a most passionate kiss upon my lips. I had never been kissed before, so my nerves sent heat up and down my body. My mind and heart were racing in sync as his lips touched mine with a hunger that nearly knocked me senseless... The moment ended shortly after it began. William turned to the few spectators and the priest announced us man and wife. I was now Mrs. William Landgraab. I watched as William went off to the other room without even turning to see if I was following him or not. Funny thing is, now that I am married, I have never felt so alone in my life... My heart was practically in my throat as I let the ribbon fall off my mother's "wedding night" gift. I took the silk and lace out of the box and slipped it over my body. Turning to look at myself in the mirror, I gasped at the sight. My heart rate broke into a sprint, causing me to break out into a cold sweat. I took in a sharp breath and held it. I looked into the mirror and lied, "You can do this..." When I walked into the bedroom, I couldn't believe my eyes. Rage and disappointment dispersed instantly throughout my body, causing me to tremble. How embarrassing, how insensitive, how dare he!

Standing there, feeling like an idiot, I watched, watched him sleep away our wedding night...
After immediately changing into a sleep-shirt, I went out onto the balcony to get some air and blow off some steam. Messaging the back of my neck as if to relieve some stress, I stared up into the night sky. Marveled by the stars, I was temporarily distracted from my own thoughts.

...At least until the smell of the ocean triggered my memory of the last day I spent with Matt. My eyes began to burn from uninvited tears. That day seemed like years ago...
--six weeks later--

"Olivia, we are having a guest for dinner tonight, so could you have the chef prepare an extra plate?" asked William on his way to the garage.

I couldn't help but admire his attire and they way it hugged his muscles. His cologne smelled rather musky and sweet, arousing my senses. "Of course," I replied.

"Good. I'm going to work. I won't be home until dinner," he said. I had assumed this, since work was where he spent most of his days, and so I just nodded, knowing he could care less about my reaction.
After changing for dinner, I went downstairs to greet our new guest. At first sight, she took my breath away. Loretta Kensington was quite gorgeous.

We sat down to dinner and talked casually of the economy and such uninteresting topics. I learned that Loretta was quite ambitious, rich, and her charisma had me hooked from the beginning. Just listening to her voice was pleasant.

But she wasn't destracting enough for me not to notice how quiet William was, nor how much he stopped eating to look at her beautiful face...
"Loretta, it was such a pleasure to meet you!" I said politely before excusing myself from the table.

"Likewise," she replied with a charming smile.

"I'm going to see Loretta out. You should go rest, for you look tired," insisted William.

Yeah, right. He wasn't going to get by me that quickly.
I stood by the window of the front door and watched the two of them embrace and exchange kisses. I could see the hurt in both of their faces. I felt the ice around my own heart melt at the sight of their pain.

Not knowing what to think or how to react, I quickly called my mother for advice.
"Mother, I can't do that," I whined.

"You are not being a good wife, Olivia. You have to give yourself to him, or he will find another source to fulfill his emptiness," she replied sharply.

I knew I couldn't argue with that. "Okay," I returned, defeated.

"Don't you screw up this marriage, Olivia," demanded my mother before abruptly hanging up on me.
Knowing that William consistently denied me, I was going to have to wear practically nothing to turn his head and get his attention.

I found him in his study watching the news. He barely noticed me until I came and sat next to him. My bare flesh under his fingers sent heat waves throughout my body, causing me to blush. He looked at me finally and realized what I was up to. "Olivia, I.."
I immediately pressed my lips against his. I didn't want him to say anything. This time, he was going to have me. There was no way around it. Surrendering to my passion, William took me in his arms and carried me to the bed. All the butterflies had escaped and the anxiety of being rejected had subsided. Watching him quickly take off his clothes sent heat pulsing through my veins. I couldn't help but admire his body as it lowered onto mine... He began to kiss me, ravenous with desire. I couldn't think, I couldn't breathe, all I knew is that the warmth I was feeling was melting the ice off of my broken heart... All of the ecstacy died when I looked into William's eyes. He had stopped and was just staring at me, fear and anxiety in his eyes. I immediately thought I had done something wrong. "What did I do?" I whispered.

"What am I doing?" he seemed to be asking himself before turning to get off the bed.
Hurt, angry, and rejected I followed him across the room, grabbed his arm and forced him to look at me.

Tears in my eyes I whispered, "what is wrong with me? I'm trying so hard here, William..."

His expression softened as he looked up to see the hurt in my face. "Nothing, it's not you," he replied in a low tone.
I knew it wasn't me. It was her, Loretta. Rage and inexplicable feelings overtook my ability to reason. "Do you think that you're the only one who lost something because of this marriage?!" I screamed, tears flowing.

"What are you talking about?" he asked.

"I saw you two. I know how you feel about her. I can't make you love me, William, but please, this is my marriage too. I'm stuck in this too! You could at least try!" I continued, struggling to hold in my sobs.

"How dare you! You have no idea how I feel!" he growled, his face solid as stone.

"Yes I do," I whispered between sobs as he stormed out of the room.
The next morning I awoke alone. I got up to stare out the window and replay last night's events in my mind. I felt my heart tighten. This would not happen again. "I surrender," I said aloud, placing a shield around my heart... --4 weeks later--

"Well, Olivia dear, you have made quite the name for yourself. People are talking about all the parties you've been throwing and they are impressed with your social life," pronounced Mr. Landgraab, William's father.

"That's what I've been hearing," I replied, a laugh playing on my tone.
I could feel my husband's eyes on me as I was dancing with one of my party attendees. "I want so badly to walk over there and politely ask what the heck he wants," I thought sarcastically.

Watching him from the corner of my eye, I watched him follow Loretta into the living room. "Excuse me, Grady, I think my husband needs me," I lied, abruptly trying to find a reason to go into the living room.
Then I spotted him. Matt Fulton. Grabbing him by the arm, I dragged him into the living room. "Wha..What are you doing Olivia?" he asked. I was staring at my husband and his mistress across the room. They seemed to be at a casual distance apart...

"Olivia?" asked Matt.

"Oh, uh, Matt," I struggled to find something to say, "what are you doing here?"

"You invited me," he said, confusion on his face.

"Right, I have something to ask you. I was wondering if we could possibly get together tomorrow night? I'm free if you are," I said seductively.

Again, I could feel William's eyes on me, burning my skin with annoyance...
Matt's scent was alluring as he took a step closer to me. "I have missed you so much," he said with a sigh.

"I have missed you too," I whispered before he kissed me, tender and sweet.

I froze, hard as ice.

"What's wrong?" Matt asked, a panicked look on his face.

I was lost in my thoughts. I felt my heart trying to burst free of its icy chamber. William...
William...his face had come to my mind as soon as Matt's lips touched mine. I stood confused, thoughts racing through my mind fast enough to give me whiplash.

"Matt, I'm sorry. I can't do this. I don't know what I was thinking..." I let out, tears filling my eyes.

"What?!" he yelled.

I looked up at him in shock. Matt had never yelled at me.
He stood and looked at me for a minute before speaking again. "Do you love him?" he asked me in a whisper.

"I don't know," was the only answer I could muster. I never stopped looking at Matt, even after he turned on his heels and left me alone, so alone...

(William Landgraab)

I stood looking out over the ocean, staring at the darkness. I couldn't stop thinking about her. Olivia. I closed my fists at the thought of the way men were looking at her tonight.

"Everyone is in love with your wife, except for you," one of his co-workers had told him the other day.

"What is wrong with me?" she had asked him. The hurt evident on her face that night when I rejected her haunts me even now.

"You've been avoiding me, Will," said Loretta in a whisper, taking my hands in her own.

"I'm sorry. I've been busy at work," I lied.

"Will, don't lie to me. I've been watching you," she let out, tears filling her eyes and in turn wrenching my heart.

"What?" I asked, already knowing what she meant.

"You love her. Olivia. Your wife," she began to sob.

I didn't know what to say. I couldn't deny that Olivia had been all I could think about since that night I had hurt her. She was in my dreams, at work, everywhere, haunting me.

"Go," directed Loretta with a half-smile. "Go, be happy."

"I'm sorry," I said, kissing her cheek tenderly. I had to get to Olivia, before it is too late and she closes her heart to me forever.
"Where is she?!" I yelled, stopping to think about which room in the house I hadn't checked. Cursing under my breath, I headed out the front door.

"Oh God, please don't let me be too late. Please say I didn't lose my chance," I begged.

"Excuse me?" asked a female voice.

"Anne? Anne! Have you seen Olivia? I can't find her anywhere!" I let out, sounding more desperate than necessary.

The maid gave me a frantic look before responding, "Uh, she went to her parents' estate for the day, sir."

"Thank you!" I yelled, already running...
Expecting Olivia to answer the door, I suddenly became very nervous, my heart racing. To my relief, Olivia's sister, Mariah, answered the door in her uniform.

"To what do I owe this pleasure?" asked Mariah with a cute laugh.

"Uh, do you know where Olivia is?" I asked.

"Lost your wife already?" she teased, "I haven't seen her, but if I were you, I'd check over at Pattie's Cross."

"Thanks!" I replied, ignoring her joke, for at the moment, I was considering it to be a possibility. I ran faster..
(Olivia Landgraab)

"What have I done? What have I gotten myself into?" I asked aloud, scolding myself. I couldn't seem to forget the look on Matt's face when he figured it out.

Listening to the water rippling over the rocks, I took in a deep breath.

"When did I fall in love with William Landgraab, my husband?"
"The same day he should've admitted to loving you too," said a male voice from behind me.

Feeling heat run up and down my spine, flushing my cheeks, and filling me with embarrassment, I turned around to have William Landgraab place his lips onto mine.
When we parted, I was out of breath and flushed, and all I could think was that I didn't know what to think.

"Olivia, I'm such a fool. I'm so sorry for hurting you. That night, I felt something for you and it scared me. I thought that Loretta was the one for me. I thought what I had for her was real, so when I felt something totally different when I was with you, I panicked," William let out, his words fast and nervous.

I took his face in my hands, not really knowing what to say, or how to explain any of this. "I love you, William Landgraab."
I couldn't help but laugh. "Where are you taking me?" I asked.

"You will see," William responded, kicking open the front door with his foot.
Laying me on the bed, William Landgraab kissed me gently and said, "I'm going to make this up to you Olivia Landgraab. I love you..." So in the end, two unlikely hearts became one. Rather than losing herself, Olivia discovered that everything really does happen for a reason and gained a love that will last a lifetime.

Hope you enjoyed this story as much as I did writing it. I want to thank everyone who takes the time to read this story and comment. I really, really appreciate it.

love, xtinabobina.

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Add Smilie

fabrizioammolloApr 16, 2012

This is a precious sweet story. Waiting for more about Chong family! \:wub\:

ShokkyOct 23, 2011


urm0mJul 25, 2011

I love this story, oit's my fave!

writedirectJul 20, 2011

awesome!! did not see that ending coming. great job!!!

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