The Art of Household Cleaning and Management for The Sims 2

The Art of Household Cleaning and Management for The Sims 2 How to keep your lots sparkling clean with three easy principles. Principle one: There is no other cleaning agent more powerful or forgiving of lacklustre hygiene than our friend: Fire. A new house is a clean house, and what better cause for a new house than a fire? It was, after all, the resulting re-housing and re-furnishing after a house fire that originally inspired Will Wright to create The Sims, so what more natural way to honour his creative genius than to celebrate the hygienic, cleansing power of fire? Principle Two: When fire is not readily available, there are several easy ways to make your Sims' homes more inviting for fire thanks to the creative thinkers at Electronic Arts:

• The fireplace
• Broken televisions and computers left unrepaired
• Dirty kitchen appliances
• Dirty counters
• Dirty sinks, showers, and commodes (in addition to the nasty menace of clogging and death by flies)
• Weeds on the lawn
• Untrimmed hedges
• Trees in sore need of pruning
• Dead fruit trees
• Dead leaves whether in piles or scattered about the lawn.
• Piles of trash and plates of rotten food (in addition to the nasty menace of death by flies)
• Indoor cooking with an outdoor grill is a fool-proof means!

As can be readily deduced, you should do nothing whatsoever to alter the degree of hygiene on a lot until our friendly helper fire comes along! If you take my advice, then never patch or add any mods to your game that defeat the joyful arrival of cleansing fire! With the addition of the Seasons Expansion Pack, Jovian lightning adds to the many ways that our friend, Fire, might enter the lot. Principle Three: The source of all uncleanliness in The Sims 2 is the Sims themselves, regardless of their gender, age, or species. In all instances, it is best to allow none of them on your lots. Here, a judicious use of the moveObjects� cheat works wonders. If you find you cannot play the game without Sims, then it is important that you preserve and augment the game's already high mortality rate (See Principle One). Although I have not had the joy of seeing this, some people report that Sims will spontaneously combust from a prolonged exposure to the Sun's healthful rays. This confirms my suspicions about the Sims being filthy beasts, since only dirty things catch fire in the game. I hope this helps you each and all to achieve the harmonious happiness of tidiness we all seek and crave. Kindest regards and best wishes for good cleaning, Miss Yashenka Pipipantz Pyrological Hygienist Arkham, Mass.